Sorry, we are out of pineapple

It was dinner time at this very nice restaurant.  One of our members waited, and waited for her pineapple juice. Ten minutes after everyone else got their drinks, she was still patiently waiting.  Half way into the dinner, she asked the waiter for her juice.  “Oh, we are sorry, we are out of pineapple.”  At the table, we were puzzled.  "Why didn’t you tell the guest that you are out of pineapple?  You only need to say, sorry, please choose something else.”  Why didn’t they tell the guest directly?

A possible answer was that they did not know how these foreigners will react. To avoid the possible confrontation, they chose a more passive approach – waiting for the guest to ask and react to the request.  If the guest waited long enough, she might be tired of waiting; or she might enjoy other food so much that she forgot about the drink. Then there was no problem anymore.  But I cannot see this being the reason that they cannot come to tell the bad news.

Unless, they did have pineapple, but could not give to the guest for whatever reason, then there was a problem for them to come out and tell the bad news.  Near the end of the dinner, they brought out the dessert – each guest got a piece of grilled pineapple.  The dessert explained why they were in such a bad situation, because they did have pineapples.  It was just that those pineapples had been assigned for something else – dessert, and there was not enough pineapple for both dessert and the drink.  To tell the guest they are running out of pineapple is like not telling the truth. And to tell the guest someone else’s needs (dessert) is more important than your needs (the drink) is not respectful and unacceptable in Vietnamese custom.  To avoid confrontation and losing face, the restaurant chose not coming out to tell the guest directly. In western culture, if there is a problem, the best approach is to inform the people involved (telling the truth) and work together to find a solution.  In this case, if a restaurant runs out of pineapple, the waiter usually tells the guest to find something else.